out & about

Goat! Reading! Purging! Oh my!

June 1, 2015 Marie Leave a Comment

I can’t believe we’re in June already!

There’s not a lot to report around here. Friday the munchkin and I had a day out to the zoo with Nana which was very tiring for us all. He’s very much all about animals lately and wanting to pet everything – the dog, the neighbor’s sweet cat Callie (I need to get a picture of her, she’s seriously the prettiest), the wild bunnies in my parents’ yard when I drop him off in the mornings while I go to work, the the goats at the Zoo’s petting area… if it’s furry and moves, he wants to touch it.

The husband and I took some time Saturday to clean off the back patio and try to finish more of the garden. All the straw we lay down as mulch gets blown up onto our patio, making such a horrible mess. I’m not sure what a better option is – wood mulch is significantly pricier and lasts just about as long. Perhaps I’ll forever be sweeping straw off the patio? Anyway, it feels really great to have it cleaned off and now I can go back to using it in the evenings to knit, watch the birds, and have a beer. It’s something I’ve really missed this spring. Our clematis didn’t make it through the winter, along with several of our other flowers, so it’s not quite so cozy, but it’s home.

I downloaded Stuff: Compulsive Hoarding and the Meaning of Things from my library’s online system and have been reading it every chance I get. I hate e-books, and very much prefer the real thing, but my local library didn’t have it available and I didn’t want to buy a book and bring something else into the house. It’s fascinating, mostly in that I can see a lot of myself in some of these chapters. I’m not nearly (ok, the husband would say not even close) to the level of hoarder, but I have a lot of tendencies to hold onto things longer than I need to and sometimes I find it impossible to part with things if there’s sentimental value. It’s interesting to see the feelings expressed by some of these people reflected in my own life. And it certainly has me thinking hard about my attachment to certain things and why I can’t seem to get rid of them. It has really helped me with learning to recognize why I’m holding onto something and then give myself enough of a push to just let it go.

I’ve been trying to keep track of my numbers of things I’ve removed (or have put in a pile to remove) from the house, and right now I’m over 100. I’m not sure I’ll be able to keep up my 5 things posts horribly long when I’ve got this kind of motivation to purge all at once. Though, to be fair, right now I’m getting rid of the “easy” stuff – the stuff that I’ve held onto for too long, the stuff I’ve decided I won’t use and – if I do need it later – I can re-buy. Once I get this initial clear-out done, though, it’ll be much harder and that’s when a whole lot more of the soul-searching comes in.

Easing back into routine

May 18, 2015 Marie Leave a Comment

We arrived home yesterday, much to my relief. By Saturday I was getting home sick and missing the baby, to the point where that night I packed as much as I could so we’d have less to do Sunday, and then Sunday morning we were up and out of the apartment by 9am. When we arrived homeI unpacked, did the week’s laundry, and soaked up all the snuggles I could get from the Little Mr. Today we’re easing back into our routine and I’m trying to prep my lunches for the week so I’m not tempted to eat out to make up for all the eating out we did over the last week.

Tomorrow it’s back to the daily grind. A little sad, but for the best. Routines are my favorite and while it was nice to have a break from routine it’s also nice to be able to go back to them with a fresh attitude so I can adjust them as needed.

More than a vacation

May 14, 2015 Marie 2 Comments

I had a lot of anxiety about this trip. I’ve never been to Chicago. I’ve never really been to a big city like this. Let alone the fact that I was going to be on my own for a large part of it while the husband is in a conference. We rarely traveled as a kid. I remember at one point we went to the Mall of America and my mom freaking out while my dad was driving as we drove through Chicago because my mom doesn’t deal well with traffic or big cities. So I suppose I had a lot of that anxiety transferred over to me. It didn’t help that, when my parents found out about this trip, I was told “Chicago isn’t a good place to be right now” – even at 30 years old my parents think I shouldn’t be off doing something on my own without… a man, I guess.

Anyway. I’ve been on my own both Wednesday and now today. I’ll be mostly on my own again tomorrow, though I get to travel the red line north to see my old high school friend. I’m happy to report that I haven’t yet been mugged, attacked, stolen from, etc. I’ve seen some things, and I’ve done some shopping. I got coffee at a shop on Michigan Avenue and sat on the patio and knit and watched the world go by. I sat this morning and knit at the Daley Plaza while watching people shop the local farmer’s market. I’ve been mostly unbothered by anyone. I feel like I’m just another Chicagoan, even though I’m not. Which is, really, kind of a big deal considering I’m a woman from a smallish town who rarely travels.

This trip, I’ve discovered, has been more than a vacation. Sure, it’s about seeing and experiencing new things, but it’s really been a lot more than that for me. It’s been a learning experience. I’m re-learning how to be on my own, something I haven’t had to be for many years. I used to be incredibly independent, but at some point – probably after years of being married – I lost that ability.

There’s also something about being away from all your things. I packed for the week with essentials: some clothes, toiletries, and knitting. The apartment we’re renting is very minimalist. The whole thing has me rethinking my entire life – just how much stuff do I need? How many clothes, how many shoes, how many decorative things, how many cooking utensils, etc do I really even need? I’ve constantly dreamed of being more of a minimalist and I feel like this week has given me the chance to live it more than I’ve had a chance to before. Do I really need all the things that I own? How often do I use it? Is it really worth spending the time to clean it, clean around it, organize it, etc? And how much of that time is being taken away from my time interacting with my environment – being out in the world rather than hiding at home from it?

Beyond seeing and doing new things, this trip has me completely re-evaluating my entire life.

Zoo-ish (What can I say? I like birds.)

April 12, 2015 Marie Leave a Comment

We made a trip today to the zoo. I’m fortunate enough to live within easy driving distance to the fantastic Columbus Zoo. I don’t think I ever truly appreciated it until I went and visited other zoos elsewhere. We really do seem to have one of the best zoos, at least when it comes to Ohio – it isn’t like I’ve traveled elsewhere to see if there’s any other that compares.

It was the kid’s first trip and it went pretty much as expected – he’d rather chew on the wood at the displays and didn’t really care about the animals. It was busy, though, since it’s one of the nicer days we’ve had in a while on a weekend. We didn’t get to see the whole zoo, but I don’t mind because we got to see my favorite: the aviary. I know, I know – the zoo is packed full of other animals to see and ones probably more interesting than some North American birds. I can’t help it. I like birds. We have a zoo pass for the season, so I’ll probably try to go back on a weekday in hopes that it’s less busy so we can get closer. Maybe if we go a few times the Little Mr will get more into it?

This evening I’m going to cut into my fabric for my next Sorbetto. I wore my black one today under a green cardigan and I absolutely love how comfortable it is to wear, which really cemented my desire for MOAR TANKS! So here’s hoping this next one turns out as awesome as the first!

Caroling, caroling

December 14, 2014 Marie Leave a Comment

There was a free holiday sing-a-long at the local theater today, so off we went and tucked ourselves into a small side aisle just in case we needed to dash out to the lobby with the baby if he started fussing. The afternoon was a mix of listening to the organists play on the old Wurlitzer and sing-a-long songs. The first one we sang was Santa Claus is Comin’ to Town and I had to fight back tears. I don’t know what, exactly, it was that made it happen, but I hit this super emotional wall and had to fight to maintain control or else I was going to be a sobbing mess and the other people around me would probably think I’m crazy.

I read this today, and I think I’m going to post it somewhere where I might see it a lot. I need to read this over and over again. I need to read it when I’m panicking about things not being perfect and just right. I need to read it when I try to make things perfect and they fail. Over, and over, and over again.

But this year while the world rushes around you, may you hold your sweet baby in your arms and realize that on this first Christmas, your baby will find no greater joy than in you. Because you are Mommy and you make everything beautiful just by being you.

Tomorrow… tomorrow I finish up wrapping presents. They’re not the handmade holiday gifts like I have always imagined I’d give – there’s no time with a job and a little one – but so far I can at least say that the holidays are shaping up, in other ways, just as I had long hoped and dreamed for.